Don't take a shower when you have kids

I love my kids. The only thing I have missed since having kids is a daily shower. Maybe it's just my kids, but today I proved again that showers and kids are a bad idea. My older two were at school so it was only the younger two at home. Of course the youngest, S, is the MOST destructive of the 4 kids.  For some reason ages 3 to 4 1/2 is the most difficult for me.  Mostly because of the destructive nature at that age.  They've been the most expensive ages of all for us.  Flooding, drawing on walls, destroying clothes, books, floors, carpet, furniture etc..  These 18 months are the reason we won't pay for our kids college. We've already done our part.  ANYWAY.  Showers and kids.  So this morning when I got out of a shower (at most 10 mins) this is what I found:

That is Mayonnaise.  Yup, an entire brand new jar.  And that's not all.  We have a food storage room in the basement that is SUPPOSED to be locked 24/7.  Apparently someone (no one has claimed it yet) left it opened and S got into it.  Not only was there Mayo all over the desk but the chair, floor, shelf and even the Pig!   Also a box of brownie mix opened and poured out, and an entire skein of yarn unwound and wrapped all over the entire downstairs.  Like Parent trap!  I was also keeping the stuff I'd finished for the party in that room.  GONE!  All the paper I got to cover the walls for the party destroyed and the picture frames I just finished painted strewn all over and scratched, you get the idea.  The 4 year old?  He just spilled some Lego's, nothing in comparison!
This is a prime example of why we call our kids D.A.'s at this age.  My folks started it when my baby sister was young and my kids have inherited the title, each in their own time.  It stands for: Destroying Angel!  They can Destroy the house worse than a hurricane (I should know, we had a tree go through the roof during Hurricane Ike in Houston), but they are still sweet, adorable, Angelic beings at the same time.  So our D.A.'s!  This is the same child who did THIS.  Point proven!  Anyway.  I guess I'll have to take showers at night or wake up earlier...  HA, wake up earlier, good one.  Have I mentioned I'm practically a vampire?  I'm beyond night owl, night it is.